Oh depression, you are a tricky mistress.

The last 44 days have probably been the most trying I have had to face in my adult life. Which is saying a lot. That is also why I haven't posted either. Which honestly is a little backward, as this would have been more therapeutic than my current choices: nap a LOT, graze, TV, wine, nap more.

Let me get you up to speed.

February 1 - Got into a car accident that destroyed the front end of my car, but only kind of scratched the other car. A very annoying and traumatic Wednesday. Spent the day on the phone with a dozen different companies trying to straighten out everything and acquire a rental. Granted this wasn't my first accident, so moving on from that wasn't the end of the world. Also, thank goodness for car insurance, because out of the $5,000 worth of damage, I still only had to pay my $500 deductible.

February 2 - Got laid off. Out of the blue. Like a slap in the face. Like an unexpected break up. I did not see this coming. Not even a little. You know it's bad when my director was in tears telling me this. I spent a lot of the first day week crying on and off, just like in a bad breakup. Confusion, hurt, angst, worry, stress. Yup, definitely like a break up.

44 days later, I'm still dealing with it. I have good days where I feel motivated and like nothing can stop me. Then I have days where moving from the couch, or the floor with the computer, seems like too much to accomplish. Hell, putting on a bra is asking too much most days.

My saving grace and why I haven't completely lost my mind? My boyfriend and my "boys".

February 16 - I acquire two little loves of my life (OMG I have had them a whole month now?!). Otherwise known as Eli and Coal.

Though "brothers from separate mothers", they are definitely siblings. One minute they look/sound like they are trying to kill one another, the next they are cuddled up together being cute as can be. See above example.

My dear boyfriend is great at getting me back on track on my off days. Ever the optimist, he has never doubted that we will be ok, things will work themselves out, and we can move forward together through this to accomplish everything else we want to.

So while I am constantly dancing with my "mistress", as she keeps stepping on my toes and trying to trip me, my boys have done a good job of cutting in when I need a little rescuing.